Sunday, July 20, 2008

shabby chic.

sundays are usually my day of cleaning and rest, but that's not to say that the rest of my week is full of exciting things to do. i watch my younger sisters one day a week and do website and photo work as an independent contractor, but other than that, my life is quite static. i'm in a rut right now, figuring out my health situation and where i want to live (sanfran? portland? seattle? la?), so as i look for jobs, i also have a lot of trepidation about rushing into things. my current friend situation is a bit sad as well, as all of my closest ones (save for justin) have moved away. i'm loathe to make new ones because i can be terribly unfriendly as it is, and i'd hate to spend all that time making friends i'll have to leave.

on my more motivated days, i dress up for the aspirational value -- dress how i want to live! hip, urban, indie! -- but this is not the norm. on days i stay in, i just wear baggy tees, my lavender fuzzy bathrobe, or simply some knickers. the result is that i am either overdressed or underdressed.

some days i feel bad about this, as if i'm not living the total design approach i mentioned, where everything has some aesthetic quality to it. i feel like even my slob clothes should be in some way stylish, and since they aren't, i get down on myself.

i guess i'm in such an early stage of my identity that how i primarily identify myself to others is purely superficial, as in, "if i don't dress the way i normally do, i'll be less of who i really am", and this is so silly. i need to get over it.

in the meantime, it was pretty great to see that the lovely michelle of kingdom of style regularly wears shlubby clothes on her off-days as well.

what about you all? do you always look stylish?

p.s. i'm watching made about how this girl wants to be more feminine, but somehow this means she can't tell boys that she likes japanese culture. her coach is trying to get rid of all her hobbies so that she is somehow more attractive to guys she probably wouldn't want to date in the first place. the fuck? i hate mtv.

6 comments:

KATLIN said...

Wow, I'm feeling the same way about life right now too, minus where to live since I'm still in school and don't really have a choice (and I love Portland, it's clean, a good size city, lots of cute places to shop!!). I've been staying home a lot lately and I just stay in my underwear all day while I see all these people looking stylish every day on their blog! When I do go out I try to put effort into my outfit, while remaining true to myself in terms of comfort and style. And, ugh, MTV along with VH1 is making me mad. I just watch the movie channels and jon and kate plus 8! :)

Brandi said...

I watch "G's to Gents" just to see Farnsworth Bentley :)

And I feel you, too.

Brandi said...

Oh weird...I just saw it's actually spelled "Fonzworth"...learn something every day!

allison said...

i'm glad to see that you can all relate!

haha, i love jon and kate plus 8. it makes me never want kids. i'm obsessed with what not to wear and the bbc america's documentary series.

brandi, who's fonzworth bentley? i'm so out of the loop. :(

x
allison

Brandi said...

He's the most sophisticated black man you'll ever have the pleasure of seeing. He often carries an umbrella for show and used to be Diddy's "personal assistant"...and Lord knows few people could put up with that. Ronnie and I enjoy him muchly.

diane said...

just found your blog through kingdom of style in her little post about her unemployment situation and what it has done to her everyday fashion.... i can totally relate. I too am a recent grad and it seems that all i have been doing since may is waking up and going through job posts online and every now and then i actually dress up to go to some interview or the mall just to say sane and not turn into a complete slob... sad i use to look so good in college